Baby steps Downstream

This morning I woke up with a brand new song in my head.

I suppose the cosmos has decided to bless me with a music writing ability, after all these... years? I don't know how long it's been. I was half awake and the melody was dancing around in my brain, the first line whipped 'round, then it pulled the next line into the room. My half asleep brain worked a little and constructed the final two lines in the chorus. I bolted awake, brushed my teeth, or something, and then ran to my blog to get it down. Of course between the bed and my computer I forgot it a little bit, so I improvised. When I was done with the rough draft of it, enough to preserve it and fine tune it later, I sang some of it into a recording on my phone. I've been doing that now. I'm impatiently waiting on my new keyboard. Srsly, my old one does not function anymore.

I spent the day doing my usual thing, and took off to the park after Reese went to church. Yes. I'm mentioning you in my blog. It'll probably happen a lot. I brought my ipod with me, of course, and danced all the way to the swing set. I'm pretty sure dancing and twirling in public is one of my new favorite things. My swing set, oh, my sanctuary. Every ounce of vision around me is beautiful. I hopped on and started swinging along to The Red Hot Chili Peppers. Then I started singing along. At one point I thought, screw it, and kicked off my shoes. Swinging barefoot is great. I don't even know how to explain just how liberating this activity is for me; suffice to say there is no drug that will do this to you. Swinging > drugs.

I am mesmerized as I stare at the open, starry sky and the shimmering river, lake, ocean... I'm still not really sure what it is. But it has ducks and nutria. Speaking of the ducks, they came one by one to watch me swing, or possibly to listen to me sing. Californication is a fan favorite.
Though I could have done this all evening, after an hour or two I got the sudden and overwhelming urge to immediately head back home, so I acted on it. I was very curious to see why it was that my intuition was ushering me back. I walked in the door, kicked off my shoes, sat down at the laptop and five to ten seconds later Reese IMs me. He just got home. Nothing too earth shattering, he might have just called me if I didn't respond. But I'd say it's like a little show of what I'm becoming capable of. No, not psychic powers; synchronicity, intuition.

Another interesting tidbit, every tarot reading I do (yes, I'm into that sort of thing) yields the exact same message. Here is an example:

'You are seeing the results of your efforts and this stimulates you; you’re getting closer to the goals that you’ve set. Think carefully before taking any decision, this is a period of drastic changes in your life. You'll have enough confidence to move forward with courage and not to give up. Period of spiritual growth. A dream will be reborn. New lovers and relationships.'

And trust me, there are a thousand other things it could say to me, but time after time after time I get this exact message in differing words. I'm also constantly bombarded with messages of a 'new lover' 'new romance' etc. etc. It wasn't something I was planning on, but I'm more than satisfied.

Another other interesting bit-tid, I'm constantly looking at the clock right at one of those odd times like '2:22' '3:33' '11:11' '12:34'. So on and so forth. I used to think "What significance could there possibly be in numbers?" Then I realized it's an easy and subtle sign that you're in synch.



My last bit of interesting tid, my whole life I've felt this presence, observing me, watching me. That sounds crazy, yes I know. I do hope that along the way you all question my sanity a little, for at least one moment. However, this is not a sign of insanity. This presence was ALWAYS right over my shoulder. Sometime while I was at Gladney, it disappeared. For the first time since I began forming memories. Yes, I know what this means. Do you?

Coincidences are the illogical invention of those who live in fear, they do not actually exist.

My advice for the week, go bark at a tree. You'll feel better instantly.


|Post Script:|

I am coming to a fully blown appreciation and awareness of just how many truly amazing and wonderful people I have in my life. There simply are no words, so here I give credit where credit is due:

My wonderful mom, we're like the Gilmore Girls. It's weird.
My awesome stepdad, you are an amazing human being, I'm proud to call you family.
My best friend Rochelle, I wouldn't trade you for the world.
My best friend Christina, you won't read this and you're terrible at keeping in touch, but we always pick up right where we leave off. :)

Reese, you amaze me by your very existence.
Ryan, you're one of my closest friends and you've been there for me through a lot.
Stoney, you're an incredible person, and thank you so much for giving my cats a temporary home when I could not.
Bri, you are just the coolest cousin ever, and an amazing friend to boot.
Megan, we don't talk as frequently anymore but you're still awesome. Talk to me sometime and let me know how things are going.

All of my Gladney Girls:
Janet
Mariah
Emilee
Marcie
Priscilla (someone tell that girl she needs to give me her new number.)
Kate
Fancy
Audrey (Even though you don't do social networking and won't see this.)
Kelly (Bleh, Mariah give me her number already.)
...Callie. :D

All of my fellow aces, you fill me with joy like no other.

Bleh! I'm out of brain space. I love you all!

Good night.